I, Captain Gman, lined up with my troops for the  first time this season. Having read about the previous weeks performance. I was apprehensive about whether lightning could strike twice, especially as BBQ looked bigger units than us.

Straight away my luck ran out as Darth Dave, the dark overlord called me over. I turned around and thought...How can someone the size of an Ewok generate such fear in the hallowed hall. It turned out that Flash, our equivalent of Balderick, had only given me half the form. Under interrogation Flash stated that the form had a dotted line so he cut it in half. I pointedout that both halves need tobe filled in. Stupid Boy!!

HRH enquired which side of defence I wanted to cover. I confirmed my decision and said my goodbyes to Her His Royal Highness as I knew it would be the last time I would see her him at this end of the pitch.

Let the battle commence.

After a couple of minutes of testing each other's defences, the "Bandit" charged headlong towards the opposition defences. Beautifully fooling the defender, he found himself enough space to slot neatly home...Go-ooooaal!  1 - 0

Before I had time to fully appreciate the first goal along came Her His Royal Highness. It was like watching the storming of the beach at the start of Saving Private Ryan. His long giraffe legs almost buckling, he worked his way round the defenders as they popped up like explosions, neatly slotting home on his final stumble.....Go-ooooaal!  2 - 0

On the next offensive, Darth Dave gave the Shambles a free-kick. I was determined to take it. Ignoring initial requests to pass, I eventually received the code word from the "Bandit", as he began his move I put a through ball in towards the centre of goal. In full stealth mode the "Bandit" breached the defence and slotted home.....Go-ooooaal!  3 - 0

Debutant "Mettle Mickey" was proving resillient in midfield and he put through a pass to the "Bandit" who slotted home again......Go-ooooaal!  4 - 0

Having popped back briefly to let the defence know he still existed, Her His Royal Highness popped up at the oppostion end again to score his second of the game.......Go-ooooaal!  5 - 0.

At this point Flash began to stand like a shell shock victim. He seemed to think that he was in Heroes and could freeze time. Unlike hero though, Flash seemed to freeze himself in time as the oppostion ran past him.

I found myself in the strange postion of thinking "How unearth could we lose this now?" rather than "How on earth can we win this mow?".

Suddenly BBQ breached our defences and scored....Doh!!  5 - 1

Never fear Flash is here. The BBQ defence had not noticed the Shambles Hero frozen in time had suddenly become unfrozen, he put in a pass for the "Bandit" to complete his hattrick....Go-ooooaal!  6 - 1

A great first half from the Shambles. BBQ were getting opportunities but were not able to convert them.

By contrast, the second half was a quiet affair. BBQ struck first blood pulling the score back to 6 - 2.

However, they had not reckoned on the "Bandit" striking again as he latched on to a rebounding shot......Score- latchio...Gooooooooooo-oooooaaal!  7 - 2

Well played the Shambles who contracted the "Bandit" after the game. May be ther is a God? No, not you Flash.